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[Sep. 28th, 2007|02:12 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  sleepy | ] |
Even if I'm nowhere near there, it's nice to know I'm doing something good.
I adore my baby boy, so much, sooo much there aren't enough o's in existence. Even if he is a typical baby with odd times for waking and a tendency to drool on everything.
And I love Kyuso so dearly, which has nothing to do with drool. Well, unless you're talking about my drool. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 9th, 2007|04:30 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  nostalgic | ] |
Jenii, I have those documents for you if you could come over and get them.
It's amazing how little you can do with a newborn around that you want and need to shower with near constant attention. Adorable little guy, so helpless and dependent on us. Hope I'm doing all right. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 6th, 2007|07:44 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  pleased | ] |
I still don't know what happened during the before.
But when I came back? First thing I saw was my son being born. Now you see why I can't dwell on the bad things?
Not only that, but after all my fussing about an "unnatural" birth, he was born naturally anyway, dah! And... he was born butt-first. Oh yeah, just like me. I'm so fucking proud.
And he does look like me, but that might just be the big baby head thing XD |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 5th, 2007|07:24 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  confused | ] |
I don't know what's going on, I really don't.
I'm trying to ignore it all in favour of paying attention to Kyuso and our new baby, which they deserve.
But it's difficult when I catch myself in the shower staring at the spray because I can see each and every drop of water and hear them all... I hear more than I want to... and then I can still feel the ache of the wounds... |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 3rd, 2007|06:19 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  thankful | ] |
I am very sorry to everyone who was upset by what happened to me. I'm still very upset about what happened to me. I should at least comment, I should, but I don't want to linger on the computer. And I should come visit, I would like to, but I'm so shaky right now. And there is a newborn to take care of.
I just need to sit here and hold my baby for awhile.
Rest assured, I will want to prance about showing him off soon enough, but for now I need to put aside all my confusion and fear and everything to take care of my son.
Of course, my heart cannot be truly content until Kyuso is happy, but I have a son, and he needs me, so I will be as strong as I can for him. His first day is not to be full of fear and anxiety, it is being filled with love. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 3rd, 2007|07:39 am] |
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| | pleased | ] |
I am a father.
And less importantly, if you hadn't noticed, I am alive. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 27th, 2007|09:00 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  lazy | ] |
Kyuso is going to see Damy today, so I don't have to be so quiet and busy spoiling him, which means I can tackle assembling the baby things and moving stuff around.
Room is currently a state, but I'll have that sorted quick. I know where everything goes, planned it out in my head, it's just a matter of doing it. Kyuso will return to a straightened room ready for baby!
But that is later, for right now... we cuddle!
Edito~ the room is fantabulous! |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 16th, 2007|07:07 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | content | ] |
I'm so damn content and happy and just... there are no words. No words at all that do it justice. You can't call it perfect, because nothing is truly perfect, but this is pretty damn close.
During some random, content, curled up with Kyuso moments, I've been musing about opening my own business. Not entirely a serious formed idea yet, and certainly not until after the baby is born... but it's an idea that won't leave me alone. I might have to give it some serious attention soon.
And NOW! ... I make dinner >D |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 8th, 2007|09:07 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | full | ] |
Who makes the best spiced eggs?
I~ make the best spiced eggs. Oh yes.
Leftovers are in the refridgerator, unless Taeo's gotten to them already. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 7th, 2007|11:51 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | content | ] |
Allo, I'm stupidly happy, what's your name? >D
Kyuso is asleep on me ♥
Our baby is growing fast now. It should be done with all the major developments and now just has to grow big. So I feed Kyuso, and stay near, because I can feel it feeding off my magic energy.
It's tiring, for certain, but it'll be worth it.
I think this new icon says how I feel very well ♥ |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 31st, 2007|05:06 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  hungry | ] |
Mmm dinner is simmering and smelling wonderful.
Which brings to mind: Addictions check-up!
Coffee - I drink only a cup or two in the morning, a third in the afternoon sometimes.
Alcohol - Not touched it in... err... I forget how long, but a long time.
Drugs - not touched them either since the drugs in coffee incident.
Food - Well, I have to eat, Kyuso has to eat, have to feed my family but I try not to go to excess. Though usually there are leftovers *cough*
Shopping - I've been shopping A LOT, but it's for needed baby things! I've actually not bought a lot yet, can't make decisions on things and I must have Kyuso input but... well between the two of us we don't decide on much XD
Think I'm doing okay. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 26th, 2007|09:38 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | happy | ] |
Today was worth staying inside and being lazy - too crowded and busy on the weekends anyway.
Not long ago, Kyuso felt the first movements of our baby. So he placed my hands upon his barely unflat stomach and I waited and waited... and finally there it was. A little flutter, just the tineist thing. So we laid there and just talked amongst the three of us.
This has me thinking, it's only been three or four weeks Kyuso has been pregnant, so this baby is developing very quickly - right in line with a youkai gestation. I'm no healer so I can't confirm this, but it seems right.
And damn, that means we have a lot less time than I had thought. Must get to buying things! |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 24th, 2007|10:56 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  loved | ] |
Starting today I'm not going to waste another moment
Even if I had the chance before I would have blown it
But you took me by surprise
And you caught just in time
Everyday you give me reason not to walk away
I stop believing the world's gone crazy
And if it is you'll save me
Starting today I'm not going to worry about tomorrow
I'll wash away all this fear that's left me feeling hollow
Because you make me want to try
And you caught me just in time
I appear to have a Kyuso laying on and hugging against my back *purrs*
Yeah yeah, call us sickening and sappy all you want. >P I don't care, I have someone I need to cuddle right now. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 23rd, 2007|12:37 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | happy | ] |
Shopping day! Shopping for baby things.
I know I know, plenty of time and all that.
But I feel the need to get a little bit of shopping done, even if it's just silly planning and not buying a damn thing. So, lazy shopping, a lot of sitting around outside for treats or drinks so Kyuso doesn't get tired. Good plan. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 22nd, 2007|04:16 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | suspicious | ] |
Well... it still feels like a threat.
But I can't dwell on that, and it borders on being paranoid and looking for enemies.
Time for making lunch and being social. Those 'oh my gods you're bald' comments never cease to amuse me, no matter how many times a day I hear them. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 20th, 2007|05:38 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | content | ] |
Kyuso and I met when I was in a very bad way, constantly in bed. And I don't think there has been much time not in bed between grief, sickness, and my own foul moods.
So, we're doing this sort of starting over thing. Introducing myself to him, actually courting him.
I don't think couples should ever stop courting and acting like dating idiots, really.
And now I'm taking him out to dinner. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 19th, 2007|07:46 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | chipper | ] |
Slept straight through the night again... I sound like I'm reporting on infant sleep habits, oh my goodness slept through the night for the first time IN HIS LIFE FINALLY WE CAN REST.
It's been pointed out to me by someone before he left that I am a superstitious elite fucktard. What am I superstitious about?
( Weellll )
And... there's more but I lost my snuggled Kyuso and I want to cook breakfast! Or at least eat breakfast. And today I mean to add in some of my old body conditioning exercises to the bow routines. Going to be lifting a lot, have to get back into shape.
Maybe lazily stroll to the shops just to see what they have to offer for babies, nothing serious yet, got time for that. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 18th, 2007|11:32 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | content | ] |
Once again I wake up in the same position as I went to sleep in.
This is incredibly odd for me, I usually toss so much. But these last two nights I have awakened to find myself exactly where I was when I went to sleep.
One would think that knowing what I know now would cause me to be even more restless during sleep, but apparently not? |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 17th, 2007|05:14 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | hungry | ] |
Ah damn, I prepared way too much malek.
So if anyone wants to join us for dinner or snag some leftovers later tonight, you're more than welcome.
And don't be too scared of it being a traditional Makai dish, I had to improvise a lot of the ingredients, a lot of human things, but it worked out.
Which reminds me, meat from Makai is of much stronger flavour and I need to adjust my recipes accordingly or everything will turn out far too bland. I managed to save this dish though, phew! |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 15th, 2007|11:04 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  awake | ] |
Ugh, I'm an ass, I know. Kyuso is blissfully, beautifully asleep and I just... can't.
And my emotions are all over the place and I can't get my head together... I really should just
I have no idea. So I flit around on my laptop hoping I crash or something and make an ass out of myself in the process. I'm sorry everyone.
So here's a good place for this. I need to know what qualities I have that don't belong in this world, and the things I have that are. I want to work on myself, I want my relationship with Kyuso to work, and I need to get out of... "Makai-mode" to do that. So, be honest, what do you see in me that's good and bad? |
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